A gentle guide
How long should a eulogy be?
Most eulogies are at their best at three to five minutes. Shorter is allowed, and nobody is timing you.
The short answer
- 3 to 5 minutes (roughly 400 to 650 words) suits most funerals.
- 1 to 2 minutes is perfectly fine if the service is short, there are several speakers, or you are afraid your voice will not hold.
- Beyond 10 minutes is rarely a good idea, even for the person who was closest.
Minutes and words, side by side
People speak more slowly at a funeral than in a conversation. You will pause, breathe, perhaps wait for your voice to settle. A comfortable pace is around 110 to 130 words a minute, which gives you these rough numbers:
| Speaking time | Approximate words | Feels like |
|---|---|---|
| 2 minutes | 220 to 260 | One memory and a closing thought |
| 3 minutes | 330 to 390 | Two short memories, a few lines about who they were |
| 5 minutes | 550 to 650 | A full eulogy with an opening, a story or two, and a farewell |
| 7 minutes | 770 to 910 | For the main speaker, with room for several stories |
| 10 minutes | 1,100 to 1,300 | The upper limit, and only if you have been asked for it |
Why shorter usually lands better
The people in the room are carrying their own grief. A few well-chosen minutes gives them space to feel something. A long speech tends to blur the best moments together, and it is hard on you, too, because every extra minute is another minute of standing up while you are grieving.
A funeral also runs on a clock. Many services are given a fixed slot, and a eulogy that runs long can squeeze the readings, the music or the other speakers. If you are unsure how long you have, ask the funeral director or celebrant. They will know, and they are used to being asked.
How to check your length without guessing
- Read it aloud with a timer. Not in your head. Aloud, at the slow, steady pace you would use on the day.
- Add a little for pauses. If you think you may struggle with a particular line, add another 20 seconds to your total.
- Print it in a large size. Practising from the page you will hold on the day shows you how long it really feels.
If it is too long
Do not rush it. Cut instead:
- Keep one story told properly rather than five told quickly.
- Remove lists of dates, jobs and places. The family already knows them, and the printed order of service may carry them.
- Keep your opening and your closing line. They are what people remember.
If it is short
That is fine. A two-minute eulogy that is true and personal is worth far more than ten minutes of general praise. You do not need to fill time. You only need to say what you would want them to hear.
Sharing the eulogy with others
If several people want to speak, agree the order and a time for each before the day. A shared eulogy of three speakers at three minutes each often feels fuller and warmer than one long speech.
Common questions
Is a one-minute eulogy too short?
No. If a minute is what you can manage, a short, sincere tribute is welcome. A single memory and a closing sentence can say a great deal.
How many words is a five-minute eulogy?
About 550 to 650 words, at a slow and steady funeral pace. Read it aloud once with a timer to be sure.
Who decides how long the eulogy can be?
The family, together with the funeral director or celebrant, who knows how much time the service has. Ask them before you start writing.
Can I read from notes?
Yes. Almost everyone does. A printed page in a large font is a kindness to yourself.
If you would rather not start from a blank page
Tell me about them, and I will write a personal eulogy from your memories, ready in about 48 hours and reviewed by me before it reaches you.
See the personalised eulogy Prefer to write it yourself? The step-by-step guide with templates is a small download.